*depressed and friend-zoned* :(

I apologize in advance for how stupid i sound, and probably how pathetic i sound as well.. :( I may be only turning 16 soon... but well, here's my story... I had my first "kiss" when i was maybe 11 or 12, that's what started my first "relationship" and my boyfriend gave me a ring a week later, i not too long after that i broke up with him, after that i was in a verbally abusive relationship so that didn't last a week, then the next boyfriend i had, i fell in love with. but i screwed up, after two more boyfriends i dated the guy i loved again, he broke up with ME and dated a girl i hated in spite. this all happened over a four year time lapse. im turning 16 now, and i've loved the same guy for 4 years.. i want a fresh start. he recently moved to another state, and he's found love where he is. i want to find love to. EVERYONE i live near, has completely friend-zoned me. everyone thinks im the 'mommy' of the group.. and that im fine on my own.. :( i have a lot of love to give to the right person, i may not be skinny, but, im working on that. i had spinal surgery this year, and i feel very grown up from my experience. i went through horrible pain and gained weight because i was unable to move for weeks.. I don't know what to do and I'm sorry if you find my story to be stupid... i just needed to get everything off my chest.. advice would be greatly appreciated..

Sorry if this sounds mean in anyway but why does people throw around the word love like nothing. Love is a mixture of feelings and compromise. So I think you really don't know what's love or at least not all there is to know. I'll just tell you to take it easy and try to meet someone that makes you comfortable and if you can't find that just keep looking.

I don't think you've truly experienced love, to be honest. You're very young and chemically, your body hasn't really even begun to understand itself, much less boys. While it's an ugly thing to admit, hormones (i.e. sexual attraction) have a lot to do with love. They help you chose the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with and at 15....your body is not quite ready to comprehend, much less crave love. Affection and infatuation are probably more accurate terms to use. The best advice I can give is to LIVE. You're young and shouldn't be worrying about boys so much yet. It's not a long time, but a year of just taking it easy and living for yourself can change you a lot, and by the time you're nearing your 17th birthday, love is going to be more relevant. You'll understand yourself and the world better and your hormones will start to understand what they're supposed to do. :)

you both are right, to an extent.. I know i'm only 16. The guy i fell in 'love' with, i had only realized i loved him about a year ago.. I used to hate it when people used that word cause i thought the same as you both before. Mop is right cause i haven't truly experienced love, but i am not infatuated. I'm mature for my age because of the experiences and the level of maturity i needed to have to go through them. I'm not saying i'm a grown up, but i'm closer to it than most my age. Also, because of some....medical implications I've had, i don't have "raging teenage hormones" anymore.. im sorry if i sound like a "sassy" teenager, but i'm not the 'stereotypical teenager' in one part of my brain i agree with both of you, but another, i know i'm weird. i am sorry if it sounds like im talking back :( i do appreciate the advice!

I didn't experience my first true relationship until I was around 18. Before and since then, I've experienced many things like rejection, lying, cheating, deception, physical abuse, psychological abuse, and one of my personal "favorites", being friend-zoned. I still experience a lot of those today and I've been single for well over a year. You are young, still in your mid teens, so you have A LOT more opportunities for 'love' than a lot of the older folks like myself. I feel the same way a lot, but then again, I too could have some opportunities. The point is, enjoy your teenage years while you still have them. Don't throw it all away like I did. It tears me up inside when I see others in their teens going through what I did because I see myself when I look at them.

Hirako_Shinji, i wont throw away my teen years.. and thank you for your advice, it really has me thinking.. also! *gives hug* :3

*hugs back* Thanks dearie! For one thing, don't do one of the major things I did my senior year of high school (after my first breakup): Attempt to cut yourself off from everyone. I tried doing that to the point that I wouldn't speak to my two best friends. I'd still hang out with them, but I kept practically silent unless they really prodded me. I was also very cold towards anyone I didn't hang out with (which was pretty much everyone but the two friends). If I wasn't working or studying, I would be isolated in the community TV studio working on some school or town or personal video project to keep my mind occupied, but it was unhealthy in the sense that I did it to get away from it all.

But there is a happy side to that last part, I just chose not to accept it at the time. I was very liked by my classmates, even though I was very different and didn't share the same interests or ideals as them. The studio is in the high school, which is situated next door to the auditorium. The pre-banquet for seniors was held in there which included the senior video I created and edited for them. I was either next door working on a project or had left just before the video started, and apparently, people were cheering and screaming for me, so much that they were looking across the auditorium to see where I was. Of course, I wasn't there, much to everyone's disappointment. So that's another thing: If you're commended for something great by your peers or even a potential lover, just accept it! Don't fight it like I did.