Otaku Boyfriend Needed! Why aren't there any Guy Otakus DX

Hi Leo, I do have a job and my coworkers have close to nothing in common with myself, it's like we are from different worlds. But I have to keep fake appearances in order to continue working there and being part of the team. Its hard to explain but lets just say its a high end store downtown and uppity people work there. They don't have interest in "making new friends" which is fine with me because like I said we are very different. i have been going to profiles and adding friends. I guess I feel a little awkward just saying hi to everyone, makes me feel desperate, even though sometimes I do feel desperate to talk to someone. But I want to have deeper conversations, not just the "hi whats up" and then awkward short messages. Perhaps I am expecting too much? I wouldn't know, being alone this long makes me forget what the right thing to do is. I want earnest friends who care, as I will do the same. Hopefully some friends that I can text during the day so I can forget about my loneliness. I end up wasting my days away in front of the computer/tv watching anime, reading manga, browsing, pretty much anything but going outside to have a "real life"? I guess you can say I am becoming the perfect Hikkikomori in America :/

I used to be quite shy in the past. However, I have pretty much gotten over it these past few months. The secret is to just force it. Take risky conversation options and say what's on your mind. Sure, that might not always work out. But how else will you get to practice. Anyways, I'd suggest practising the art of conversation through random texting, since there are no real consequences to failure. Eventually, it will become effortless and automatic to you. I could be one of your very first friends if you want. I sure do hope that you will be able to stand up again, even stronger than before :)

Closing off feelings are for "normals", that are too afraid to show their real selves. I don't get why so many others are afraid of just being themselves, lol... So I guess I'm not the only one trying to improve their Rl skills, eh? Kinda in the same boat of trying to get to know people after my break up with my Ex (We broke up amicably, but it made me realize just how secluded and alone I actually was before she occupied my life) and it's pretty difficult. Social awkwardness ftl. Well, I am making some progress in a semi-familiar environment. Been going to Arcades and getting people to play Pump it Up/DDR with me and make small talk from there, lol. Well, best of luck with your emotional healing! I know lots of us here would like to have people to talk in a save environment.~

Thank you The Key, I really agree with what you are saying. I do feel overwhelmed just thinking about "having" to find people. It's easier said than done. Which is why I agree that taking things slow is what will work best. In the past I have rushed certain things, just looking for the immediate positive outcomes, but in the end rushing doesn't change outcome of situations. So yes I will take my time and stay willing and open to whomever may come to my life with positive influence and honesty.

Key... The irony, indeed... Sad hypocrites. You know what's desperate? This thread... We all get shy, fuck it. Pull those(benwa:P) balls out and just branch out. Jesus... I don't care if its male or female, its off putting to see so many whiny threads... Guess what? We all deal with shit, each and every one of us...and end rant... Otherwise, best of luck. Guys here tend to like to act like white knights, so enjoy. :)

Well that's out of it then. But what most are saying is true, You must force yourself to get rid of shyness. Try to make yourself a goal you want if you think your " Wasting" You time in front of a computer screen all day. Though don't worry, there are plenty here who wouldn't mind getting into deep conversations with you. You just have to look and sometimes be the one that instigates them. When you text someone while saying" What's up" Also say ask them of there likes, dislikes, hobbies, Just things about them, You'll get deep conversations sooner or later trust me. @Yasshat, Come on man, There's a difference between being truthful and just acting like a jackass.

Thank you Ace I'd like that as well, to be friends and practice random conversation. I do force most of the conversations that I have with people, but I guess I tend to go too in-depth, and most people just want a superficial conversation? At least that's my experience with real life conversations. Also I tried the random texting thing with the person from this website and it just ended up pretty terrible. So I have been avoiding something like that happening again. I usually can't figure out if I did something wrong or if I am just a terrible judge of character. I seem to get myself in a lot of emotional trouble. Gah! but anyways I am trying to have healthy relationships with people! Is what I am trying to say ^^'

@ Guren I actually used to be pretty socially unskilled. think this was a combination of being rather sheltered and naive. One of the things that really helped me was getting to know myself better. ever take the meyers brigs test? its a pretty accurate test shows your your personality traits. And as far as friends go Look for ones that will unconditionally love you. not matter how messy things get they will always be there for you. I struggle with insomnia and depression but my in real life friends always are trying to empathize with my problem and put themselfs in my shoes and are understanding when im not in the best mood. Oh and the boyfriend thing I would think a pretty girl such as yourself would have no problem finding a boyfriend lol.

Afomaru thank you so much for sharing your story and your support with me/us! I am going through very similar circumstances! Just got out of a 3 year relationship, with a man I am deeply in love with. But somehow the world got t him and us and well, its heart wrenching to say the least. I have had to start out from zero, having no friends of my own, or even the knowledge of knowing where to start. So I am taking things slow, specially after the bad experience with the person on this site. I though I had met someone who shared my dreams and interests but they were just trying to use me, and it made me feel like perhaps thats what all the guys want from me. So that is why I am giving it a try again and not letting these bad experiences in my life dictate who I am. I cannot change i am happy with myself I just have to find people who are happy with me too, and i with them. You sound like such a cool person to hang out with. I wish i was more outgoing and approachable I guess, just enough to find some good hearted friends. People who will have my back no matter what and I have theirs.