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How to Talk to People

infernalmonsoon
For me things just tend to go naturally - I don't think learning to talk to people can really be passed on because everyone has their own method of approaching conversations. Some people won't resonate with you and sometimes everything just falls apart into awkward silence but it's often at no fault of your own, just try and find people who does resonate with you and the way you talk to them and you'll most likely make friends. At least that's how I feel about this whole topic thingy.
unicornoscope
How to talk to people?... Be nice~! ^_^ That's how I talk to anyone~! (Except if they're mean first then... I'll probably get mean back tbh.)
penna
Dec 26, 15 at 7:41pm
Coming up with things to talk about is always hard and while I'm sure you might have things you could talk about yourself, it's not usually good to always talk about yourself. Which is where the trick is, what do you talk about? You can talk about current events and the weather if you wish but it probably won't get too far. In the end, it only makes it more difficult if the person involved isn't actively engaged in creating conversation. You can however give the conversation pushes. You can do this by asking questions about the other person. While it's not a for-sure thing, people are easier about talking about themselves than other things because not only can it be flattering at times but it's something they don't have to think about to answer. It's easy for them and it can be easy for you. I often like to start with people I've met by asking what their dreams and aspirations are. What are their hobbies and what do they like to do. It helps me really get inside their head and understand them and sometimes it helps them feel more open about talking when it's something they love. And you can build around that. Talk about interests, likes and dislikes, and if you're daring enough, what their opinions are on certain subjects. It's best if you keep an open mind too. Just be willing to hear them out and be supportive. If they become interested, within no time they'll start asking you questions too in return. And it can be about anything. Don't feel confined by normal questions. I've even asked people things like, "What do you think 'Blue Hawaii' flavor tastes like?..." or "IF YOU HAD A SUPER POWER WHAT WOULD IT BE?" Have fun with it and try not to stress yourself out. You're just trying to extend a hand and be a friend.
xueli
Dec 26, 15 at 10:43pm
I kinda just talk to people. I just kinda say something somewhat relevant and you can go from there. Big thing is that you have to kinda be conscious of someone's body language. The words we say are actually such a small part of how we communicate that it kinda doesn't matter what exactly you say (unless it's something insulting). The majority of human communication is nonverbal, which is why I think the "Just be yourself" is helpful if you understand that the point of it is to not feel pressured. When someone is talking to you and they're mentally panicking, you can totally tell. Not necessarily though their words, but definitely through all their nonverbal cues and that just makes everything super uncomfortable. Also with nonverbal cues, you can see if someone is even open to conversation in the first place. If they're busy with something or just don't feel like talking, it's gonna end badly no matter how good of a conversationalist you are.
sub
Dec 27, 15 at 1:56am
For general talking: Don't build it up, there is no trick - all you have to do is talk. The easist way to have a conversation is with someone that has common interests. You can talk about sports, work, school, class, dreams etc there are endless topics. If you are feeling nervous start off "slow" don't just approach random people but talk to those closest to you first. Every time you go to the local shop to buy something say " Hi, hows it goin?" and then "Bye have a nice day". Get used to meeting and greeting. Build a rapport with all the people who you interact with. Join a new club / activity its an easy way to talk as you have something in common and there is the idea that you should get to know each other.
whitewolf_3
What works for me is adopting the following mindset: 1. The world is my mirror 2. Damned if I do and damned if I don't With that mindset, I would practice and talk to people. Even if the conversation turns out to be awkward, I can forgive myself. People tend to think more about themselves and have short memories.
gudmoore
Dec 27, 15 at 9:18am
The big thing is... Practice. The more you attempt it, the easier it becomes. I have anxiety, so I completely understand how tough it can be. But when you force yourself to talk to people, you slowly desensitize yourself to the fear you had.
mischa
Dec 27, 15 at 5:13pm
I think it depends on who you approach. The other party should be able to carry out the conversation too because if youre the only one who tries and tries ...then your efforts are futile. So pick who you talk to! :)
flyingturtle
I suppose u expose yourself to talking around girls and ppl In general till u get good at it. Practice can make u better
superfranky
Practice makes perfect.
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