Log in with your MaiOtaku account.
Home Forum Anime Search Newest Help

Serious talk about a long term realtionship

azanarchy
If he has absolutely no desire to ever get married or have kids down the way that's likely not going to change unfortunately. If you've already sat down and had these serious talks and you're both unyielding in your feelings then I don't think a year will change it. Those are huge steps to take especially a kid. If he has said he has no desire to ever do those things and it's not just an issue about doing them soon then I think it'd be time to move on with your life. I don't think it's all that weird to hang out with your mom though. That's his mom lol maybe he's going through a rut in his life and feels comfortable being closer to family at this time. The lack of motivation thing could be something internal with him like maybe he's depressed or something? I know a lot of times when my depression hits I'd rather just stay at home and do nothing rather than go out with friends or something since I feel comfortable in my home. As for the job thing maybe he should find something else he wants to do that'll be a job he at least likes might make him more motivated to hang out
a_wesley_g
Have you tried talking to his mom about it? He's spending alot of time with her? Maybe ask her advice. She knows him best.
devo1
I would talk to his him and If that won't help then I'd try to talk to him one last time before thinking of being single.
dragoon24611
Well said. I agree. Pretty much what I told her in a smaller version.
reisenpai66
Could be one of two things. The despression is mutually exclusive to the situation and everything is fine, or its mutually inclusive and hes depressed because he doesnt want to hurt his friends and gf but wants to just be left alone. I've had girls 'fall out of love' with me in the past and so i know the signs of that.. this seems a bit different though, so it's hard to say.
fallenbeautyaries
I don't bother talking to his mom, she doesn't like me because I'm mix it a long story short. Let's say she doesn't like inner-racail couples. She believes sticking to the same race etc. Thanks guys your alot of help. I haven't been on much lately.
fallenbeautyaries
As said before I don't have an issue with him hanging with his mom it his mom. But I find it werid because he always says he hates her because she is an acholoic. He use to never hang with her just hang with me and his friends now he basically blows me n his friends off now. Just does things with her it could be depression too but I'm. I tried to help so did his friends he lost alot of his friends, he clams he don't care yet he complains about having no friends. I'm like I don't know your shutting people out but your mom, but yet you bitch about her all the time when you do hang with her. It like he isn't happy with anything.
a_wesley_g
His mom could very well be a big part of the problem. She very well could be guilt tripping him. And it may not be something he wants to repeat to you. But this is a very blind and wild guess, and I'm most likely wrong. But if he's spending a lot of time with her, despite complaining about her. There must be a reason behind it. Either way, if you intend to continue this relationship. I recommend talking to his mom... Polite conversation... Invite her to lunch, just the two of you. Ask her how's she doing first to get an idea of her mood from her response. If she's not being rude, and you feel she'll be receptive, try asking about her son. Say he's been depressed lately, and you're not really sure what's going on. Always talk about him with as positive a spin as you can. If you're serious about marriage and kids. Then this is something you can't escape. You need to get on better terms with her, even if it does seem like you're beating your head on a brick wall. When you marry someone, you aren't just marrying that person. You're getting their entire family. Mother-in-law especially. If you have children, she will be their grandmother. And if she hates you, she will make your life miserable. If you're having doubts about your future with this guy. Add this to the list of reason to break up. How receptive do you think she will be to your children? Will she be spiteful towards them? I highly doubt her perspective on mixed couples will be the same after laying eyes on her grandchild, but there are some simply bad people out there. It's something you should consider. This is partly why I think it's very important for you to at least try having lunch with her to get to know her, and let her get to know you. Ignorance is what fuels bigotry. Mixed or not, it won't matter if you can get her to like you. And if you truly can't. If she is just totally intent on hating you. It's all the more reason to get out of a toxic relationship that's clearly not going in the direction you want.
Please login to post.