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How much time should you wait before having sex with your partner?

superfranky
So I'm curious, how long do you think you should wait before doing the dirty deed with your lady/man? My gf says 1 month is still too soon. I'm obviously not rushing her or anything, I'm just curious to know how long other people usually wait.
queenmemester
doesn't matter the time, whenever u guys are both ready then go for it but if one is clearly not then don't go for it.
superfranky
Yeah that's what I think too, so I just tell her that we'll talk about it whenever she feels like its the right time, however she likes it when I'm dominant so she doesn't want me to ask permission if I wanna do something perverted to her, but she doesn't want me being too sexual, so where's the line? I feel like she drew her line with crayon.
queenmemester
well if she thinks it's still too soon then i don't think the girl is ready. Try waiting after the first month, and just make a sign. Like test the water, but if she still seems uncomfortable then stop. U can discuss with her then again idk, im a virgin. Can someone else help this man?
superfranky
I agree, I'm still just gonna stick with just waiting until she says something. I'm still curious to know if other people come up with their own amount of time that they usually wait or something, hell some people do the nasty after a few dates.
majinveta
There is no right answer. It depends on your exact situation and all the subtle details surrounding both people. One month seems pretty arbitrary to me. There's nothing wrong with sex. When the moment is right, you'll probably both know..
loli_vampire
If she's being that vague about things then it sounds like she's either really inexperienced and doesn't know what she wants and or she has some sexual hangups or insecurity. It's not uncommon for a guy to sex and then leave a girl so if it happened to her before she may just want to be sure you are really serious about her before she gets that intimate. She may also just want the time to be right, be in the right mood and feel ready which could take her some time.
j_oxford
Whenever the time is right, so that can range from day one to death bed.
ringo_blue
When you're both ready -- that's really the only answer to your question. And by being ready, it means both partners should be responsible and held accountable for each other's feelings on the matter. Never ever use pressure or emotional blackmail of any kind, no matter how subtle. Being ready means that both of you understand consent and that it can be withdrawn at ANY TIME during the whole sexual encounter. Understand that even if she said that one month is her waiting period, she could still change her mind at the last minute. Being ready means you are both aware of birth control options and the risks involved with using them and/or not using them. Being ready means you are both clear as to why the sex had to happen and what follows after that with regard to your relationship. My first boyfriend waited for me for two years because I wasn't ready emotionally and mentally. He made it clear from the first time we attempted to do it (unsuccessfully, of course) that since I would be more at risk being younger and more inexperienced, he would only take the cue from me when it comes to our having sex for first time. It's really a case-to-case basis. :) Good luck and may the best judgement reign over you and your partner! And yes, she may have drawn the line using a crayon, but that is still a line. Don't cross that until she is ready AND until you are ready for the possible consequences that would come if you cross that line. :D
tritri23
Depends on the people involved. Insecuritys, morals, standards, and feelings come into play so can never tell until the partner gives you the go ahead. My standards a month, my brain 5 days (;_;).
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