Ephemerality

Does anyone ever feel like everything is temporary? I feel like everything in my life is short-lived and temporary. I feel like I'll be leaving this area at any moment, and that my job won't last. I feel I'll be leaving my university in no time, and that what I am doing today will be nothing like what I'm doing a year from now. It makes it very hard for me to try to make bonds with others, and invest time in anything at all because it feels like there's no point, because I'll be somewhere else entirely, leaving everything behind, soon. It all feels like sitting down for a one hour long movie when you have to leave in five minutes, or cleaning off paper plates that you're just going to discard in favor of a clean one next time, anyway.

Yeah, this forum's not working out for me. I've had about six topics go completely unanswered, and it feels like any conversation I get into abruptly ends, unless it is a topic that is filled with drama where people argue over petty things.

Well the forum is very inactive as always. People use this site more like a facebook, so if you are seeking friends here you should probably contact via their profile.. To the topic I feel short lived when I think about the universe and earth how long they have existed compare to myself, its only a short live. Also the feeling popups when I finished a school it will feel like a short live. The only thing I can come to think about that make my live is very long are when you are totally bored and staring to that damn clock, and sometime it feels like the clock going backwards. xD

I'm not sure that that is quite what I'm feeling. I appreciate the input, though. For example, where I live, everyone in my field (computer science) has moved in order to find a job. I am the only one of my friends still living here; everyone else has gone to another state. I know that I, too, will likely be moving to get a new job when I graduate. I feel like there is no point in making any new bonds here, knowing that I'll have to pick up and leave soon, anyway. In regards to having to contact people through their profiles, that seems counter-intuitive. I sort of pictured that I'd find people with similar interests in the forums, rather than posting comments on the profiles of everyone that I can.

Yeah it sucks but us people who are active gotta bring life to this forum! :P Its never waste of time to get to know people, you might find a bond that is stronger than other bond you made before. How do you feel with calling and meeting with your friend who have moved away?

I have to say not everything is temporary, maybe a few encounters may be a learning experience that can last you a lifetime. Others may just be something to teach you a lesson in that moment so you don't make it again. Things may seem like it's going fast, but if that's the case then it's all about how you enjoy the little things in that moment. Also the forum is still becoming known, and being developed. It's somewhat inactive here and there but always interesting people on here. A pleasure.

I apologize in advance for the wall of text. @blackmage I feel that it is a difficult task to meet with my friends that have moved away. One friend moved to Washington (I live in Pennsylvania), my brother moved to Ohio, another friend moved to Virginia, yet another moved to New York, another still is back and forth between South Carolina and Afghanistan, and some friends that I am less close to live in Washington D.C.; all of them used to live near me at one point, so it is hard to suddenly be without all of them. As you might imagine, planning to meet all of them is very time consuming and expensive, since they all live far from each other, and travel to any one of them is more than I can afford, with working part-time to support myself while I attend college full-time. They're all a little bit older, so they have already graduated, and found jobs. I see them maybe once or twice per year when they return home to visit family, but after I'm gone, too, I won't even see them then, unless I make enough that I can fly around the country, or have the time and money to drive for such a short visit. I'm not so good at communicating with people that don't go out of their way to talk to me. I typically don't say anything until I have something to say; when I was young, it was easy to bug my friends with random idle talk, but these days, I feel no point in saying anything when there's nothing to say. That's not to say that I don't wish that I had more things to say, but I feel that I literally have no reason to try to contact them. So, I don't. Over the years, I've become really tired of people asking trivial questions like "How's college? What's your major? What have you been up to? What's new?" Whenever they ask, I always have the same answers. Over the last three years, I don't think my life has changed significantly enough to warrant any different response. As such, I no longer ask these questions, myself. This limits me to rather specific questions where there is information I need to know. Since there haven't been any, I haven't spoken to them. I don't know what I'd say if I did... @cantthinkofabettername, @shadowdemonx9 I agree that everything has an effect. Like they say, every droplet leaves ripples. I guess a little background on my personality might make for a better explanation. I am aware that my time is limited, as are my resources. I seek to allocate them in the best way possible, to yield the maximum results. I will always prefer things that last over things that don't, because having something that is permanent yields higher value than something that is not. Thus, when confronted with the decision between making friends with someone at a campus nowhere near my home, when I know I'm going to move away, anyway, and doing something else that I can take with me when I leave, I will never choose to make bonds with strangers, because they are the more temporary action. In all likelihood, I won't see them again, so compared to something that will last forever, like completing a task that's on my list of goals (finishing something so that I can move on to the next, itself, is an act of permanence), it can be seen as a waste of time, as cold as that may seem.